The goats and sheep ran to us as we approached with fists full of grass.  We stayed in the feild until the clouds faded from pink to gray as the sun cleared its way over the horizon. Sweet life of these creatures, we shared for a moment as we rolled in the grass with them. goats are sweet social creatures. The bull in the last photo with the hump on his back is the king of the feild, and we must keep our distance.

We we sitting in the grass surrounded by goats when Mariah jumped up. 

“Raleigh you might want to get up!” she urged. I had just started to stand when he charged us trowing his head back and forth. 

“Woah okay okay we are leaving!” The goats followed us to the gate. We were almost to the car when Mariah noticed me franticallly patting my pockets. 

“Did you lose your keys?” she asked. 

I was in disbeleif, but nodded, “they must have been in the same pocket as my phone.”

“okay” she said swiftly,” lets find them.” 

I immediately thought about how poor our chances were, but responded enthusiastically. 

We searched for an hour until we had combed the feild entirely. I crawled on my hands and knees in the now darkness feeling for them, and only finding brown turds between my fingers.

We called Emma, and she came to the rescue. Laughing the whole way to us, she couldnt beleive it.  

           

I started with a river day. Three cars of people came out. I climbed a rock face and broke(or fractured) my toe. That eve we went to a pub (and started a card game) and then to a kegger party where we entertained ourselves. 

  
Sunday I said goodbye to Robert, and then went to an 80s movie night.

  
Monday I went to devils playground, the top of the world, and the redwood curtain. Sweet people. 

  
Tuesday spent at the beach frolicking with amazing and athletic company and ended with a night of music and charm at the farmhouse. 

  

Hum of the pavement
beneath my toes
I watch for onlookers watching me
Beginning to balance

Leaving is the best part
I run high on freedom
allowing us all our favorite company
I wouldnt do the things i do alone

Familiar faces remind me
Cheers
to a home I will return to
Echo mountain

Hands on drums
Euk strumming
voices fill the misty air
hours pass and we sing on
Sharing more than we thought we would.

  

masked behind the glasses that show intelligence, because in this society a blank face means innocence. I dont what you see, but thats the face of our democracy. we dont even have to try, just making rymes. Blanked are the faces of the innocent, taking on the world like the president

Focus on the trade for no other reason than the trade
concentration internal and unmotivated
with goals i do not work
fun is my unconcious way of learning
step forward
let weight off back foot gentle
arms move you against your fall
stay on stay on
fight
im not writing a poem
i just love the trade
I smell tacos
But my breath tastes of gin 

So many things we think are beautiful are plastic
but what we fail to realize is that beauty can’t be manufactured.

the cricking of the fire
our eyes meet again
there is so much beauty in few words little

Sierra headed back to San Diego today. I am so happy to have freinds that come and go and are free. I am happy that I could build the relationship with her that I did before she left, and that I could be there to say goodbye. She is an important person to me, and I feel amazing when ever she is around. I have not felt connected and open to someone in the way I felt with her for a very long time (if ever). I love her and wish her the best on her journeys. I know she will have so many stories to tell me by the next time I see her again. 

Sierra has taught me:

• Positivity. Ive never heard her say a single negative thing about anyone. I love having people like this in my life.
• Celebration of moments. She taught me about being stoked just to be. Where ever she is, she is happy to be there. We could be in a small group or a big group, SD or Humboldt, and she would tell me how great of a time she is having and how much she loves all that is around her. 
• Independence. I feel so independent and empowered and thoughtful around her. We really flow with each other to create that. I like how she is okay being alone and even traveling alone, because it shows how congruent she is with herself.
• Spontaneity. There are a lot of ideas I have and journeys I want to take, but dont usually have someone who will jump in and do them with me. I loved how easy it was for her to say yes, and how I never had to worry about her having a good time. I loved how I would actually do these things too since I had her company. 

Things we didnt do yet 

• Go to the bookstore
• Moonrise herbs
• Take pole lessons
• Lightening in a Bottle
• Travel along the coast
• Backpack together
• visit her in NY?? 
• Travel the world 

The stains on the table are fading
Proud slacker
face tickles
Low levels of mobility
passionate oppposition to the passing of my life

Insense burning
Work is a part of being a good person
I think to my reflection
Trying to convince myself to do dishes
But its true
If my goal is to be calm and peaceful
Then I want to create that in the spaces around me.
Therefore, I have a new rule:
I can only think kind words
towards myself
As long as I am in my room

Another thought: 
Identity attachments distract us from our identity
Generations before us , didn’t have the induced anxiety perception through social media that we do.
Looking for that next high
Likes release chemicals in the brain
We are social creatures
Using our biology against us.