An empty journal
22 years of forgotten memories
Again, I won’t remember today.
A missed exercise,
a forgotten goal,
Grit slipping through numb fingers.
I won’t pretend I’ll be able to return.
I feel asleep most days
Like I’m in a body made of clay.
I’m a stranger to the mirror.
Was it you who chose this path?
Is there such a thing, as a choice?
And how could you have known…
You were so wrong about me.
We have too much to lose,
it’s too far to turn back,
so we carry our selves deeper.
Lost in a misty mess of never ending vines,
I cry to the world begging for a path,
I’ve been lost for four hours!
I finally begin back the way I came,
Only to find the trail 20 meters away.
Trekked barefoot through sticks and snow
My skin broke but my spirit held
Rocks of gold and silver
Now a part of me.
Light even in the mud
Steen green hillsides sprout wildflowers
At the base of white glaciers
Framed by tree tops
I once left only to go
My bag rubs red pelts into my shoulders.
Rocks merge with blood.
Butterflies land on plastic bags
Holy miracle of water
Dipping into effervescent warmth
My skin is cleansed
My head spinning
My toes soft.
I’ll always love those I’ve loved
Even if I cross the street to avoid them.
But a note to self,
Make sure the words “I love you”
aren’t him saying “I own you”
Make sure the hand on you,
isn’t claiming a prize.
I sometimes wonder how
Much I exist
In other people’s minds.
I want to love
That we still stroke each other’s faces
When we are old.
I wonder if my grandparents hold each other
And whisper words of love
Or if too many years
Have hardened their hearts
And left the other as an enemy?
Hand in hand
How long have you remembered me?
We are as we always were
Striped shirts and black pants
I love you, my best twin!
Eager to love.
You know what to do when I am leaving.
Make the goodbye quick so it will be okay.
Cherish the days together.
I’ll remember falling asleep next to you.
Company is love’s messenger
Side by side-
I am happy
I am so happy.
Glowing heart I know,
How long I have remembered you.
Grateful that you remember me too.
Thick fluffy swirls of white
Cuddling as lovers do
Fingers tracing the rising elevation
Until just a wisp remains
Green giants peaking through
Swimming in the clouds
Can the pilot see?
Peak atmosphere, 25,000 ft.
It’s fun to watch people turn to ants.
It’s sunnier up here too.
If I stepped outside this plane I would fall.
A sport one day I might explore.
In the direction of gravity.
Hours pass and my life, ambitions, duties slip by.
Absorbed as they wish us to be
I am running in a wheel.
Circles of information pouring into me
I have not chosen yet
Deflected, I open the door for you,
Focus and simplicity.
Do not share your life.
Choose what you put your energy towards.
Find comfort with the slowness.
Pianist strumming the prink faces
Gazing at her silhouette as they pass
Palm trees and people
Black slacks and purple baseball T
Confident yet gentle
Is this art?
A common question for a materialistic mind.
Tell me something about myself.
Tell me something I already know.
(going through old journals and documenting poetry!)