I need to work on my reliance on others. You cant build real relationships when you’re invested for selfish reasons. I’m a caring person, but what does that mean if at the end of the day, I’m in it for comfort.

Ruby recently decided that being friends wasnt an option because of how distant I was when with Sheamus. Besides my diagreements with that, and my changed view of her as a person, she touched on something very true that has been an issue for me before. 

I’m havent been alone enough to be my own person. I have leaned on someone(s) for near 5 years, and love is comfortable for me. But that defeats the purpose of it, the specialness, te closeness. Its degraded to a selfish lust of satisfaction thats only gaine from the light headed extasy and butterfly bliss of being in love. 

Did you know that you can stimulate the same parts of your brain and fall in love on your own? With yourself. 

To appreciate love you must go without love. Also, it really does have to be the right person. Trying to change someone is just unrealistic and weird.